Swing, Swing...I'm Going Away...

I have been in the lifestyle for all of 9 months now and so far it's been very interesting. I say interesting for lack of another word to describe something that has challenged me, gave me the most delicious highs and one or two of my most terrible lows in a while. Interesting because of the dynamic between people, the politics inside the community and the different types of people and relationships in the lifestyle.

The first thing I noticed when I walked into the club for the first time was the very clear divide between regulars and the newbies. I did not approach anyone that first night and nobody approached me. This was the case with my second visit as well so I became disillusioned with the whole thing and thought we'd never get the chance to actually play with another couple. Our third time there resulted in an orgy so I was obviously very wrong. As I said before, interesting. This was our first proper play (besides the 2 times prior Prince and I had sex in full view of the rest of the people).

Our second play encounter was a braai at one of the couples' house. As is custom, these people obviously need some names so let's go with...Luna for the lady and...*ponders* Powder for the gentleman. So Luna and Powder invited us for a braai with a bunch of other lifestylers and this turned out to be one of the most amazing evenings I had ever had up to that point. With everyone being in the lifestyle the conversations were absolutely amazing. No hold barred, no pussy-footing and no small talk. We spoke of politics, sex, religion, psychology, spirituality...no subject was taboo. These are the types of braais I have unknowingly been waiting for my entire life! Mainly due to the mindsets of the people there but also because very few people got falling down drunk (only two out of about 10 people were sozzled and they eventually sobered up. I sat naked in a jacuzzi, talking and touching, just languishing in the heat and the good company. I sat on a blanket in front of the hearth, talking, massaging, touching and having sex. I was in the bedroom, having sex with two women while two men watched...it was truly magical! At some ungodly hour the two ladies and another couple wanted to leave so we had to wake Powder to come open doors and the like and afterwards we raised the subject of sleeping arrangements. At this point Powder invited us to sleep in the main bedroom, on the extra bed at the foot of their bed. Although the sleeping was a tad uncomfortable due to the fact that Turtle (might change his name later) was sleeping on it too but the waking up more than made up for this.

Ten years ago when Equine and her boyfriend (let's call him Muddle for lack of a better word) and I had our little thing, waking up was my favourite part. There is something to be said for waking up sandwiched between two warm bodies...slowly emerging from sleep to know that there is more than one body in this room and I had sex with both of them really blew my mind and stilled my soul. 

Waking up on that bed, at the foot of another bed, with my Prince cuddling me from behind and me cuddling Turtle in front of me, listening to Luna and Powder whispering to each other with intermittent giggling...'twas truly a beautiful morning.

Once everyone was fully awake the rest of the house guests joined the beds and we spoke about the night before as if it was just another night (because it was, for a swinger). That after-orgy talking is something for the poetry books, as far as I am concerned...I cannot wait to have more and more of them.

This then brings me to the last time we went to the club (and slept over). It was a "Swingles" party so Prince and I were expected to "hunt" alone...something we both had some reservations about but, being the kind of people we are, we went ahead with it. It was a bit awkward, feeling like I had to be mingling and not hogging the space next to my boyfriend so much but in the end it wasn't too bad. I eventually ended up having semi vanilla sex with one of the guys I had played with the weekend prior at the braai. We shall dub him...Pom Pom. So Pom Pom and I started giving each other oral next to the dancefloor (this after I spanked him for putting his shirt back on) and then we moved on to the blue room for closed-door sex. It was interesting, having intercourse with another man for the first time in 3 years and even though I am unsure of whether I'll be doing it again, I am glad I did it. It's given me a deeper (no pun intended) appreciation for my Prince's methods and our love-making. Though Pom Pom's cunnilungus skilss are most certainly note-worthy and I will most assuredly be partaking those again I don't think we will be having actual intercourse too often.

His wifely person (let's call her Dahlia) was not impressed with the length of time we spent away from the main area (even though permission was asked) and she trumpeted that a new rule has now been added (he should make sure to get a room before 12). I instantly felt sorry for Poms and made a beeline for my very own Prince and was welcomed with open arms and kisses...interesting contrast. 

This was where the evening (early morning) became very interesting as Powder followed me to the bathroom to witness me urinate. Apparently he even asked Prince for permission, as if I am his subbie...but anyway, more on that later. I walked into the bathroom and picked the last cubicle, slightly nervous as I still had a buzz of sexual energy rushing through me and my brain was not fully functional yet. Nevertheless, I sat down on the loo and he squatted down in front of me, his hands on my knees, gently keeping them away from each other. I smiled at the look on his face and made my first attempt to urinate. Nothing. I kept smiling at him and he alternated looking at my eyes and looking longingly at my urethra, waiting for his prize. Eventually my body decided it felt safe enough and I slowly released, haltingly emptying my overfull bladder. He touched me and allowed the water to run over his fingers and the look on his face thrilled me in unexpected ways so I could not stop the grin from spreading across my face. Once I had finished I wiped, got up and went to wash my hands. He handed me some soap and I handed him a towel - all very sweet and considerate, not at all like I had just peed on his hand. 

Walking out I made the mistake of telling him that my bladder can hold 750ml so for the next hour I was drinking water for the purpose of giving him the "full 750" as he called it. I think I was still in a trance from the play in the blue room so I embraced the challenge as any self-respecting submissive would. Interspersed with drinking cup after cup of water was Powder tugging painfully at my nipples, making my knees tremble and buckle. Powder with his fingers inside me while I hold onto Prince for dear life. Eventually Luna was becoming restless and in need of her home so I told Powder it's now or never. 

He took me by the hand and led me to the purple room (where Prince and I had had our first "sex with the door open" months before. He took a sheet and, still folded, lay it on the bed where he intended lying down. I was instructed to climb on top, my vagina on his stomach but after this and another position didn't allow me to easily pee, I decided to stand up and I eventually managed to pee quite spectacularly on his groin and stomach. Now, please understand, I am not into golden showers but I am into giving pleasure so...I oblige and share of my talents (750ml). It was not entirely unpleasant, peeing on someone who is (technically) a Dom...I wonder what the future holds.

The come down from a weekend of play is often not very graceful, I have noticed. The sexual energy really charges me up so the days following are often rather bland by comparison but I'm just about level now (4 days after the fact). I have also thought about submission and Domination and I have come to the (tentative) conclusion that I still prefer submitting to the Muse more than anyone else. Maybe it's because our D/s developed so naturally, maybe it's because he was my first, maybe it's because he is more into control than pain...I don't know but the fact remains, I'd rather be submitting to Muse than Powder and as such I feel that, should Powder and Luna proposition me for the position, I would rather decline. I know they do sensual and energy play as well so I'd much rather partake of that facet of their sexuality than the D/s parts. I don't know how they'll take it but eh, it is what it is, no?

I would naturally love to see Prince have relations with Powder but I'll more than likely have to wait a bit for that...hehehe.

Maybe in the next post I will (finally) get to discussing my Polyamorous tendencies instead of detailing my dalliances...maybe not ;)

Exposed at the SEXPO

First things first, let me start off with a bit of an introduction...

I have always been a sexual being. For as long as I can remember I have been interested in sex and the topic and the doing and all things connected to these. I only had sex at the age of 21 because I was convinced that if I should start having sex in high school I would not finish school. I started masturbating at the age of 14. My first kiss was when I was 7. Before this I used to sit on my mother's neck massager, not understanding what I was doing but knowing that it tickled and that I liked it.

I started my sexual activity at the age of 21 and boy oh boy, did I do some hurried catching up!

In December of 2005 I started talking to a guy on the internet. This guy was 20 years my senior and worked in Sudan at the stage. We used to chat 'till the early hours and email erotic stories to each other that we each had to continue and send back as our turns came around. I fully intended to break my virginity with this man but in January of 2006 I met someone else. We shall call him Marko for the purposes of this blog. Marko and I met on the self same dating site that I met (we shall call him Lumber for this blog) on and we immediately hit it off. Naturally I didn't want to tell Lumber that I had met someone so I continued talking with him while Marko and I courted. 

Marko was everything I had never seen before - confident, knowledgeable, deviant yet romantic...I thought he had fallen from the heavens and I could not believe he was remotely interested in me. After about a month of courting, we had sex. It was a Sunday morning, on top of the covers with the early morning sun filtering into the bedroom. The light was crisp and cool and the blanket was rough yet pleasant. It didn't hurt at all and I was surprised at this fact. About a week later we broke up. 

During all this was Lumber and I planning our weekend in the mountains where he would deflower me. I didn't have the heart to tell him someone had beat him to the punch so I continued the ruse despite my guilt and shame. 

Our weekend arrived and it was everything a "first time" should have been - there was candlelit dinner, soft bedding, lingerie and an antique bath, shared the morning after. He was soft, gentle and attentive and it was beautiful. I could half convince myself that this had been my first time. 

A little while after this, we broke up. 

March 2006 was the turn of Parkie who introduced me to new music, new television series and new sensations. I honestly thought we would form a relationship...until I met Equine. Aaah...Equine. What a thing of beauty she was. See, I had started a dating profile where I listed myself as bi-curious and she offered to show me the ropes...as long as her boyfriend could join. I hesitantly agreed, they collected me from my house, stuck me in a jacuzzi and thus occurred my first threesome. This, while I was seeing Parkie. Naturally, Parkie and I soon parted ways following my experience with the couple and I was freshly single.

Before I move on to May I have to mention that there was another someone I was chatting to during all of this and we shall continue with the name he has on the other blogs of mine: The Muse. Dear gods, the Muse. The tale of the Muse and I carries on 'till today so I will not go into too much detail at this point in time. The basic outline was that I saw his profile on the dating site, felt like he could never love someone like me, risked it and added him and waited with bated breath for his reaction. He accepted, we chatted, we clicked something fierce and the conversation moved to texting.

This was in February, if I recall correctly. We met in June at a mall and it was glorious. We courted for four months after which he broke the news to me that we cannot be together anymore and a week or so after that I met the Fuckwit and we had our time together.. Oh oh - I almost forgot Skinny in May! We saw each other for a spell before I met the Muse in the flesh and realised I couldn't carry on lying to the poor man so I bid him farewell. After having had sex with him in all sorts of strange places. The Fuckwit and I were a fairly normal couple, albeit a tad destructive so that ended on a rather bad note. We are still friends ten years after the fact so I suppose it couldn't have been all THAT bad. 

2007 was the time for (also from the previous blog) New Guy. New Guy was a strange man, a strange man who gave me the permission I needed to be whoever I wanted to be, sexually. He was a giant of a man with broad shoulders and an even broader mind and he taught me many things about myself. He was the first to touch me in such a way that it rained from my vagina and it was magical. It didn't last long, this dalliance but it was magnificent. Our friendship ended this year, sadly. There was Metal after New Guy, there was the guy who basically date raped me, there was Stormy and there was Dweller and there was Equine again and all these happened intertwined with each other and the "friends with benefits" arrangement the Fuckwit and I had. 

Like I said - I had catching up to do.

Things calmed slightly after 2007. In 2008 I met Count and we were together for three years. After him I moved back in with my mother and met Button who was my BDSM slave for about a month. After him I met Tink who was my girlfriend for a further three months. After that I met Jack, we did a shitload of drugs and the relationship crashed most splendidly  late 2009. 

In 2010 I decided that seeking love might be the reason why I was not finding it so the only thing that happened in the following three years was occasional drugs and drug-fuelled sex with my bi-sexual friend at the time. 

In 2013 I thought I had abstained from dating long enough so I created a dating profile and again and met someone who I had sex with in my brother's bar, bent over a bar stool. Soon after that I told him I was under debt review and he subsequently broke up with me. Later that year a friend from school contacted me via Facebook. We met that night for the first time in 13 years and we spoke 'till the wee hours - telling each other everything we didn't want the other to know. We drank too much, engaged in some fumbling foolery on the floor of my brother's bar and I ended up passing out in his arms. 

He is my Prince, and today we are Swingers.

Which brings me (finally) to the meat of the matter - I recently became a swinger and I am loving every second of it.

When I first met a swinger (while at a naturist resort) I was curious as to what it entailed but quickly followed my mother's damnation and decided they were dirty heathens, to be shunned and scorned.

Now, I don't know how swinging feels to other people or why other people enjoy the lifestyle but I have realised what it means to me. I'll get to that later.

I joined the site in October last year but only attended and event much later and the first couple of times I was there, nothing happened. There were no people nagging me for sex, no men whistling at me, no women grabbing their men tighter as I walked past, no men (or women) propositioning me for anything, not even conversation. I was not impressed but simultaneously I was relieved. I had expected to be dodging bullets all night but what I found was that people pretty much kept to the people they usually interact with - nobody really bothered with the newbies and it actually made me feel safer. Bored, but safer.

The first time I had any kind of sexual contact at the swingers club was with my Prince and we left the door open. I had always suspected I was slightly (ok, ok, extremely) exhibitionistic but after this night I was 100% sure. Voyeuristic exhibitionist, what a combo. The second time I went to the club I had my first orgy. Just last night I was telling Prince that I really love orgies. I then proceeded to laugh with surprise when I realised what I had said. Never ever have I ever thought that those words would escape my lips and yet...I should have known. How my polyamorous tendencies eluded me for so many years heaven only knows but at last I have come into myself. Pardon the pun.

So I am a Swinger. In the Lifestyle. Polyamorous and Pansexual. Whoda thunkit.